Deal With It
Language: English
Alcohol Amethyst (Steven Universe) Background Amethyst/Pearl (Steven Universe) Cunnilingus Explicit F/F Fanworks Garnet (Steven Universe) Gratuitous Uses of 'Fuck' Jasper (Steven Universe) Jasper/Peridot (Steven Universe) Lapis Lazuli (Steven Universe) Lapis is a shitty life coach Masturbation Minor Emotional Abuse Morning After Cuddling No Archive Warnings Apply Pearl (Steven Universe) Peri's the big spoon Peridot (Steven Universe) Peridot makes poor life choices Sex Toys Smut Steven Universe (Cartoon) Yellow Diamond (Steven Universe) blatant disregard of speed limits illegal levels of cute now with 70 percent more smut
Publisher: Archive of Our Own
Published: Apr 27, 2016
Description:
"You can put out an ad on Craigslist! I can see it now! ‘Cute, single, white female seeks felon with no high school degree and a scary, rusty panel van like something you’d see used in a high profile kidnapping. Needed to torment mother out of persistent pestering to find a significant other. Payment includes cash and free Thanksgiving meal.”
Human!AU where Peridot hires Jasper to be her fake girlfriend but realizes she fucked up bad because now all she wants to do is get into Jasper's pants.